Saturday, August 29, 2009

Glamping Day Four: The Bear

    On our last day in Gatlinburg, I was awoken by Abz yelling, "OMG! A bear got into our trash! It's everywhere!" Like any good sleuth, I immediately put on shoes and ran outside to the scene of the crime. It was there that my father-in-law and I, he in his robe, discovered that our large protective trash bin had been carried from one end of the porch to the other. (These are claw holes from where the bear grabbed the bin.)



    Our house happened to have a wrap around porch that went almost the entire distance around the cabin. You could only exit from the one side. The bin had been carried past several chairs that did not give a wide berth, a grill and my wet clothes from Zorbing.

    The bear then apparently shook the large bin until the metal piece that kept it closed fell off. The doors then opened, the trash cans fell and the bear dragged the trash bags into the woods. It was everywhere. However, the bear kindly did not disturb the chairs, grill or my wet clothes, which was really nice, all things considered.


    Everywhere we went in Tennessee, I saw the same message. Garbage Kills Bears. Being an animal lover and certainly NOT wanting to kill bears, I decided to pick up the garbage. While my mother-in-law later pointed out I didn't need to clean it up (??), I couldn't fathom leaving the trash there.


    Picking up the stuff on the driveway was easy. Climbing down the muddy, steep hill in my MBT shoes and a skirt was a different matter. Not wanting to negligently kill a bear, I risked falling in mud to pick up gross leftovers. I continued to brace myself (which always yields a 50/50 chance of falling) on branches and rocks down the short incline to the tree line to retrieve the trash. (It is steeper than it looks here. Trust.)


    When I made it to the tree line, I stood up and took a breath, looking back over my shoulder at all of the trash I had cleaned. Feeling proud, I looked down the mountain and then up at the clear blue sky. I was filled with pride from my good deed.



    In the next breath, I heard the loud crackle that is only accomplished when something very large and very heavy moves in the woods. Instantly knowing the bear hadn't yet left the very trash I was collecting, I did what any good non-bear killer would do. I hiked my skirt up to my hoo-haa so my legs could take wide steps up the steep hill and I ran like nobody's business back into the house.

    I would like to point out a few things:

    1. I carried the collected trash with me and left it in the drive way.
    2. I pulled my skirt down before running into house, where I almost smacked into my father-in-law, who looked perplexed as to why I was running.

    I then hurried around telling everyone what happened. Loxy's bro and sister-in-law actually went outside looking for the bear. Don't ask, I don't know what they would have done if they found it. Perhaps just photographed it, I suppose. Loxy himself saw the bear from an upstairs window, but I was the only one with a close encounter of the bear kind.

    What does this have to do with makeup?

    After my encounter, I was visibly shaken and looked a little "off". Not wanting to go to breakfast at "Little House of Pancakes" looking disturbed, I turned to my new favorite trick to make your eyes look naturally amazing.I used Mally's Lash Illusion Liner under my eye, just along the base of my lower lashes. Then I lined the inner corner of my upper lash line with the same liner. Here is the key. I used Tarte's Rest Assured pencil on the inside rim of my lower eyelid. Then use the Rest Assured just under the line I already created under my lower lash line with the Mally pencil. I finished off my eye with the creamy shimmer part of Rest Assured just dotted and smoothed out in the inner corner. This makes your eyes pop while looking refreshed, without looking like you are wearing any makeup!

    What are your tricks for looking great, despite being almost chased by a bear? (or anything like that!)


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